Third class fun (you know this one's gonna be good :)

Just think of the movie Titanic and the third-class recreation area. Ok this e-mail has gone downhill already, even if it was as low as it could possibly be before even writing anything. I could ask you to think of Moulon Rouge :) Even if I do think it's a cool idea to have a sort of modern-day musical thingy. Yeah, you can just disregard any comment I make just be sure to have a better one in your defense!

So here I am...relaxing and maybe accomplishing a couple personal tasks.
Such as listening to Britney Cleary's "IM Me" for the next 3 hours straight.
And trying to install RedHat Linux 6.0 for the 3rd time unsuccessfully.
Great. Seems like I'm wasting time but it's good for me to get my bearings back and everything, even if it means I have to go through countless hours of agony watching endless re-runs of Family Matters. Whatever that meant, I'm not quite sure myself. Maybe I really should be doing more than smacking around hundreds of Undead Scavengers in Diablo II. My Amazon needs a rest, but her bow is more unstoppable the Bill clinton's...um intern girl.

Big deal. So what, I've got nothing better to do than to write to everyone.
What's wrong with that? I've gone through a tough week and just want to sit back and enjoy some of the things that usually put a smile in my face.
Unfortunately, this includes all the stuff you usually don't associate "ZA"
with. Like brushing a hippo's teeth or cleaning up after a shark feeding frenzy. Hopefully we'll all be able to breathe a sigh of relief once I get done rotating my ceiling tiles and alphabetize the books in my basement here. If you think I'm joking about any of this I suggest you watch the Weather Channel for 6 hours straight and tape it on VHS and watch the tape over again. Then you will feel what it is to be like me. And after that you can go ahead build a six-story card house out of all the flashcards you have accumulated through your school years.

Just when you thought it was safe to come out, your insatiable hunger for brick cheese causes you to fetch an empty Pepsi cube to pluck feathers from the nearest chicken in sight. That is the sound of a newborn world...a light from a curious sky. It has begun. You're in the hands of destiny. A destiny which is as unpredictable as Christina Aguilera has points of dignity. I really don't know what that means but I think it has something to do with the rate that moose migrate to the northwest every March and have animal fun with other mooseses. Animal fun, that's all you need to have a party larger than life. No Backstreet Boys included, but highly recommended. I heard they enjoy animal fun as well. Well, that's relatively unimportant, compared to my dog's desire to disembowel the largest rodent on this side of the Milky Way. But stink has her own qualities as a member of the canine family...she likes to bark and howl and go nuts when the mailman comes. The first time I wore my baseball umpire uniform she almost attacked me. Do they really think those cartoons are real with the dogcatchers and everything? I don't know. How else could you explain the fact that dogs explicitly have negative vibes to those wearing blue uniforms.

I bet it would be sort of fun just to hang out and enjoy walks on warm, sandy beaches. Yeah, it would be good if only I could remember not to forget my sunglasses at my friends house. But really chicks dig those who dig themselves. Literally. I once dug a really big hole and crawled in it.
But when it rained it was really cold and wet and soon lots of fish joined me and I felt like a seagull. Was I to blame? Probably not...I guess I learned a valuable lesson from all of it. I have learned many lessons in life, one of which was not to pilfer snausages from the neighbor dogs. I should've known better, but it took some 25 1/2 lacerations on my lower extremities before I grew to realize that rabid animals are evil. It's funny that I never contracted rabies...I guess it may have been because it was only in a dream, and nothing really happens in dreams. Dreams. Some are absolutely strange, and others are just plain disturbing. My sister once had a dream that she was pushing me around in a shopping cart on a nude beach. Geez the mind games. I've had stranger dreams though...and they do involve farm animals so I don't care to elaborate. Ok fine I've broken down already. I lied, there were no incidents with farm animals. Just really fat people. Fat women to be exact. I am not a cannibal. I am also not a beached whale. I may harpoon a beached whale. Yeah that sounds like fun.

This is your brain. This is your brain on ZA. Any questions? I sure have many to ask myself, and I'm sure everyone else has plenty of them as well.
No real surprise there, though considering most of my topics in the last 18 months have had to do with naming me after a food and an earthly substance (rocks). Great...what do I have to look forward to next...if you call me ZA why don't you just eat me? If you were ZA and you were hungry, would you eat yourself? I know I would. And I'm hungry right now :)

No you don't have to worry I am NOT going to devour myself. I think I already mentioned I was not a cannibal...I can't remember and I'm definitely not gonna look back in the jumbled mess I've already written to find the truth. Just everyone have fun and stuff and keep smiling because there is a little ZA in all of us! And that you can't deny!

Ok it's time for me to sleep I think...
-The magnificent ZaRocks